I’m writing this while slurping down a half-frozen, bottled orange juice which, I admit, is not the most effective use of my time–multitasking is highly overrated. But I want to write about my fear-induced meltdown today while it remains fresh on my mind. This year, this month, this day, this minute is a time to overcome fear. It’s time to break the shell and spread those wings.   Surprise yourself; do something that scares you, something you dream of doing. Today I cracked that shell and oh, it felt good.

Last month I tried out for the, “You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown” (YAGMCB) musical and landed the part of Schroeder, the 9-year-old musical genius (hmm, my exact opposite). I knew nearly squat about Peanuts. Was I scared? You betcha’. My knees clattered all the way to try outs and my clammy fingers left sweat on the steering wheel, but I used that nervousness to give me energy. So for the first time, I sang out loud for someone else like I just didn’t care, and I was shocked that I was me.

As we rehearsed through January, I don’t recall ever singing my solos or other songs 100% correct, and I often sang off pitch. It was a nutty cycle. When I concentrated on singing I forgot my choreography or vice versa. By last night’s final rehearsal I felt 85% okay about my music and choreography, but my stomach began knotting up as I envisioned the worst possible scenarios for this morning’s performance.
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